Resources

The text Intimate Relationships by Thomas Bradbury and Benjamin Karney at UCLA’s Marriage and Close Relationships Lab distinguishes among different types of social relationships: Interdependent relationship: A relationship in which the behavior of each participant affects the other. Interdependence is the defining characteristic of any social relationship. Personal relationship: An interdependent relationship in which the partners consider each other special and unique, rather than as member of a generic category (e.g. classmate or neighbor). Close relationship: A personal relationship in which the partners have strong, sustained mutual influence over a broad range of interactions. Intimate relationship: A close relationship that includes some kind of sexual passion that could be expressed and shared. While these definitions are not universal, they do show the key dimensions of distinction for various kinds of relationships.

I’m often asked of all the relationship books I’ve read, which one I would recommend the most. As with any recommendation, a good answer takes into account the person that’s asking – their tastes, their learning style, and where they’re at in their relational journey. So while I can’t identify the one best book for everyone, below are some of my favorites. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman and Nan Silver Attached by Amir Levin and Rachel Heller Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin The 80/80 Marriage: A New Model for a Happier, Stronger Relationship by Nate and Kaley Klemp Non-Violent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg The All-or-Nothing Marriage by Eli J. Finkel The 80/80 marriage authors maintain an up-to-date list of resources here, which includes a high-level summary and a key takeaway from each book. ...